Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize