...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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