Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
