just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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