Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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