I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
