You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
