you guys were way drunker than both of me
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
