When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
She announced her abortion via fbk
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
