i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
So. Much. Porn.
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