You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
