plz talk dirty to me
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
