So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
