So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
