He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
