I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
