cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
