i always forget guys have bellybuttons
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
She tied me up with her honor cords...
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
