I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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