She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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