guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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