Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
