Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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