Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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