You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
