god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
