She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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