But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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