Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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