I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
