i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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