so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Enjoy the penises
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
