Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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