Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
