Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
