I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
