do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize