Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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