..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
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