11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
