yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
