Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize