Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
