u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Randomize
