Those balls look pretty dangerous.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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