I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
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