hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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