Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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