i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
