He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
